Everything I want
Everything, not in the abstract or in the future; now, immediately, tomorrow.
1. To find a purpose, that thing that will define myself or at least give me a start on it, so I can get to work and stop hanging out in this ether like, vaguely pleasurable but soul burning limbo
2. Some real and meaningful relationships. Most of the ones I have now are just tapped out. I need new people to connect with, fresh blood and ideas, more motivated people withmore active minds. And I want a relationship with a girl too, something interesting and different that totally works. I'm fucking tired of waiting and working for that without getting anywhere.
3. Crazy, crazy sexual experiences. Hanging out with ultra liberal sex writers will do much to expand your mental space, or in my case, simply more eager to try out the insanity that's been hanging out there anyway that you're not comfortable enough to discuss even with ultra liberal, sex positive writers in the first place. I need to get out of my comfort zones in a lot of ways I think.
Item number one is most important. I don't know how everyone else defines themselves, but for me, I expect that my work and the way I live my life will be the most important definitions of who I am. I already know how I want to live my life and I've done a good deal of work on that. There is more to be done, but at least it has been defined and the work begun. As to what exactly I will spend this life doing though, I still have no clue, and that is incredibly problematic.
Been meeting new people and somewhat more aggresively pursuing new friendships although I do have some reticience left over from a Summer totally consumed by the Blonde and Opera Girl. I feel like a ma emerging from a cave. I also feel like a man reciting a laundry list. I'll write better when I'm more inspired. Sometimes this thing just serves as a notebook for my future self, cryptic references that I will one day look back on and try to decode in order to understand what exactly was going on in the space behind my pie hole at some particular period.
1. To find a purpose, that thing that will define myself or at least give me a start on it, so I can get to work and stop hanging out in this ether like, vaguely pleasurable but soul burning limbo
2. Some real and meaningful relationships. Most of the ones I have now are just tapped out. I need new people to connect with, fresh blood and ideas, more motivated people withmore active minds. And I want a relationship with a girl too, something interesting and different that totally works. I'm fucking tired of waiting and working for that without getting anywhere.
3. Crazy, crazy sexual experiences. Hanging out with ultra liberal sex writers will do much to expand your mental space, or in my case, simply more eager to try out the insanity that's been hanging out there anyway that you're not comfortable enough to discuss even with ultra liberal, sex positive writers in the first place. I need to get out of my comfort zones in a lot of ways I think.
Item number one is most important. I don't know how everyone else defines themselves, but for me, I expect that my work and the way I live my life will be the most important definitions of who I am. I already know how I want to live my life and I've done a good deal of work on that. There is more to be done, but at least it has been defined and the work begun. As to what exactly I will spend this life doing though, I still have no clue, and that is incredibly problematic.
Been meeting new people and somewhat more aggresively pursuing new friendships although I do have some reticience left over from a Summer totally consumed by the Blonde and Opera Girl. I feel like a ma emerging from a cave. I also feel like a man reciting a laundry list. I'll write better when I'm more inspired. Sometimes this thing just serves as a notebook for my future self, cryptic references that I will one day look back on and try to decode in order to understand what exactly was going on in the space behind my pie hole at some particular period.
posted by Flint at 10:21 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home