Saturday, May 20, 2006

What I think of humanity

Everytime I read about some great evil (like this say) committed and hidden or justified in the name of religion, my jaw tightens. I think to myself, oh for a hell for them to burn in. But I know and those who do these things while hiding behind God and scripture know that there is no hellp, no God to turn to, no Devil to roast with. The greatest evils are committed by those most certain of their inability to be touched, those who know that there will be no punishment for their evil deeds besides the death of an already useless conscience and the scorn of people who don't matter anyway.

A man like Hitler may be reviled in History and have died an ignoble death, but this isn't because of his moral failings. It's because he failed at his mission. Had he succeeded, you would all be celebrating his birthday yearly, giving thanks that he destroyed those infidel Jews and enjoying the world as he had ordered it. After all, you do no less when you celebrate Columbus day or any one of a dozen holidays that conceal murder and atrocity in innocent celebrations of the world as we know it.

I've given up on thinking that people don't know when they are doing wrong. I believe we all no very well when we are arguing self interest over what is right, no matter in what language we choose to couch that argument. I've decided this only recently, yet another step in my continued disdain for the human race as a whole.

Part of the reason for this most recent decision is my search for an honest conservative opinion to read and argue with online. That search has been mostly a failure, and I've decided that the reason probably lies in the fact that conservatism, at least in the form that it is practiced and carried out in this country (and perhaps everywhere else, but I can only speak of what I know) isn't a different take on the world by rational and moral people. It's plain immorality. The things it argues for aren't different policies or different ways of solving the same problems the liberals have. What it argues for is greed, and racism, and sexism, and the aggressive dominance of others for profit, pride and power. If successful in each step, there will be another, more extreme and justified in the same terms, all for the same purpose though, the uplifting of the conservative over those believed to be inferior. In other words, what I'm arguing here is that when someone argues that black students get unfair benefits through affirmative action, what they're really pushing for is a return to slavery. When someone argues that it's fine to run Iraq because they obviously can't govern themselves, what they're really arguing for is colonization.

Is this overly cynical? No. You're a human being, the most flawed creature it is possible to imagine. I know that there is no God because no one could possibly have deliberately designed such a despicable race of creatures. The next great human civilization (if the current one does not destroy us all that is) will have slaves, will have genocide, will have poverty and disease. We are not making progress of any sort, becoming more moral creatures or making the world better for alll to live in. We are brutes, fighting for power and dominance over one another. In every generation of this cursed race, those who have power and wealth will try to keep it for themselves, no matter the cost (and I mean no matter if that cost is death or pestilence) to the rest of humanity, and it does you no good to argue against it, because there is nothing in all of human history to suggest the opposite. While there have always been those of soft heart who fight for equality and better conditions for others, they have always been canceled out by those more desperate to hold on to their power and positions.

So when you find yourself arguing with someone who is arguing a point that seems to defend white male privilege, or that privileges religion over a clear moral good, or the impracticality and expense of doing the right thing, know that you are not arguing with a rational being, you are arguing against the very worst of humanity, the basest elements of the human creature, that thing that keeps us from progressing and ensures that the majority of the planet will always live in poverty and despair that a powerful minority may hold on to their pitiful positions.

I'm not even in a bad mood writing this. It's a truth I've only recently allowed myself to accept and the truth ought not to make one angry, just open your eyes.

Monday, May 15, 2006

a mission?

I know exactly what I'd like to do. I want to tell stories, of African American life and African life that haven't been told. If there is anything that I think it'd be really worth it to do, that is it. I'm sick of all the potrayals out there and I think there are far more worthy and interesting stories to be told from within those populations. I'm African, but America is my temporarily(?) adopted home. I hate that the media only sees this population when they need a foil for America's success or a boogey man to scare the good people of the suburbs. I hate that Africa is never potrayed except as a helpless receptacle of Western goodness or greed. Everytime I see a pathetic piece of tripe like City of God, I cringe and feel the need to punch a wall. I must sometimes alarm my neighbors with my tendency for gutteral yelps and boxer like bouncing whenever one of these things gets to me.

So, I'm doing photography these days and trying to say something interesting about Harlem. Whether I'm successful in that or not, I'm going to continue. I'll tell stories, in prose, in poetry, in rap, on TV or on film. Perhaps I'll do it in all of those. But I think that's a pretty decent goal for one person to set himself. There, I have a little more direction in life. It's decided.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

No, I have not been kidnapped by aliens.

I'm just dealing with a very busy end of semester, badly. I'm irritable and apparently have shoulders too broad for any suit in Manhattan to fit me. I know this because I tried every last one this morning when I ought to have been writing my youth cultures paper. That paper, which is due in three hours and fourteen minutes, has stymied for the last couple of weeks and I must now put it together in less time than it takes to try on every suit from H&M and Zara to bloody Bloomingdales. I'm gonna go the wedding in bermuda shorts and a fishermans' hat. Anyway I'll quite whining now and get to writing. I'll be back.