Comfortably numb
I've been cheating on you here, but not much. I'm as disaffected with blogging as I am with most other things. I'm in the middle of a thoroughly depressing episode, or perhaps I'm just in depression. Whatever it is though, its cause is readily discernable. I can't write my thesis and haven't been able to since I ended classes in May. What that means is that the majority of this year has been pissed away doing nothing. I'v lost all interest in the topic, cannot for the life of me convince me to get to writing even if it is only to write shit. And I can't really move on with my life until the damned thing is behind me. So it depresses me every time I think of it, which doesn't really help my motivation to do anything about it. I've been known to wish for magical solutions to things occasionally. This would be one of them. Where's that bleeding fairy god mother when you really need her?
In my disaffectation with life, I've taken to women and endless television shows (stolen off of torrents) to keep me entertained. I gone through entire seasons of HBO's The Wire and Deadwood in about two days each, and I'm about to get into Showtime's Dexter. So much for not owning a TV as a step towards productivity.
Luckily (I think), my sex life hasn't been affected by any of this. For Thanksgiving this year, rather than submit myself to a long, uncomfortable journey to Virginia to spend too much time with near family who bore me to death, I cooked dinner (an almost all Nigerian meal no less) for a lovely Israeli lady at my place. It was pleasant, different and we had some pretty good sex afterwards. Unfortunately pleasant isn't that exciting and I don't think I'll be calling her again. I don't imagine she'll mind that much either. I'm only now becoming adept at differentiating ease of conversation and connection for real chemistry.
Then there is J, with whom thankfully, the sex is not fucking pleasant. It's hott and it fulfils that requirement of mine a few posts back that I stretch my boundaries some. Stretched they are, and although this is once again a mostly sexual relationship, it's a good one, and that is a blessing. As to something a little more meaningful? Well, I asked this girl who is a regular at my bar out this weekend. We've spoken a few times and she's interesting. Hopefully she calls and doesn't decide to boycott the restaurant.
Anyway, I feel like I'm writing a book report and my ass is melting into this chair (I must buy a more uncomfortable desk chair so I don't spend quite so much time in this position). What have you all been up to?
P.s. Don't be commenting on this blog on the other site. That blog is a public face, while this one remains very much an introverted site of whine and misdeed.
In my disaffectation with life, I've taken to women and endless television shows (stolen off of torrents) to keep me entertained. I gone through entire seasons of HBO's The Wire and Deadwood in about two days each, and I'm about to get into Showtime's Dexter. So much for not owning a TV as a step towards productivity.
Luckily (I think), my sex life hasn't been affected by any of this. For Thanksgiving this year, rather than submit myself to a long, uncomfortable journey to Virginia to spend too much time with near family who bore me to death, I cooked dinner (an almost all Nigerian meal no less) for a lovely Israeli lady at my place. It was pleasant, different and we had some pretty good sex afterwards. Unfortunately pleasant isn't that exciting and I don't think I'll be calling her again. I don't imagine she'll mind that much either. I'm only now becoming adept at differentiating ease of conversation and connection for real chemistry.
Then there is J, with whom thankfully, the sex is not fucking pleasant. It's hott and it fulfils that requirement of mine a few posts back that I stretch my boundaries some. Stretched they are, and although this is once again a mostly sexual relationship, it's a good one, and that is a blessing. As to something a little more meaningful? Well, I asked this girl who is a regular at my bar out this weekend. We've spoken a few times and she's interesting. Hopefully she calls and doesn't decide to boycott the restaurant.
Anyway, I feel like I'm writing a book report and my ass is melting into this chair (I must buy a more uncomfortable desk chair so I don't spend quite so much time in this position). What have you all been up to?
P.s. Don't be commenting on this blog on the other site. That blog is a public face, while this one remains very much an introverted site of whine and misdeed.
posted by Flint at 6:15 AM
1 Comments:
By the way, that lady I asked out at the bar totally did boycott the restaurant for a while. She recently resurfaced, on a date! I grinned and served to the best of my ability, amused if disappointed. Checking on them at some point, I'm fairly certain I caught her mention that her background is investment banking, which might explain her lack of interest in dating the young bartender (aside of whatever other reservations she might have). Oh well, on with the chase. There must be other foxes in the woods.
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