Tea with Perverts, blogger parties, sex with a blonde goddess and other adventures in a New York weekend

Just got in and took off the clothes I've been wearing for the last two days. I'm hot and sticky, worn out and a little wired. I've had sex, lots of it. It started yesterday. The actress/blonde had stopped by after her evening of partying Friday night. I don't remember if we had sex then, but we definitely did Saturday morning and it was a very wonderful beginning to the day. Then we did brunch before I went off to have tea with a merry bunch of perverts. This was fun, nothing like conversing with a group of completely sexually liberated people. It was by far the most civilized gathering of such filthy minds imaginable though, other than the gentleman who disappeared and then reappeared wearing leather chaps and acted the part of maid for the rest of the gathering before getting spanked with a range of floggers. I said civilized. Selina may also have sparked a run on corset shops statewide by changing into a very beautiful one towards the end of the afternoon. It was good talking though and one of my favorite moments came in the aftermath of the tea, when speaking with Lex and Les on the subway, we managed to broach the topics of naked parties, swinging and numerous other deviances on a crowded subway train. That'd have made a tasty addition to the Overheard in New York pages if any of our neighbors was so inclined.

I went home after that and contemplated staying in, but after a great writing session, I felt fired up enough to fly and decided that even though it was past midnight, staying home was not an option. And so I headed over to Fauxy's birthday celebration all the way at the bottom of Manhattan. It was probably 2am before I got there and it appeared I'd missed the party. I'd planned to meet the blonde, who was out partying (did I mention that she parties a bit?) anyway and was going to head over to meet her, but she was tired of being where she was and wanted to come over. I tried to explain that the people I hoped to meet weren't there, but she was fairly drunk and after calling for the location about four times, she made it to me.

I've mentioned that the blonde is fond of me, haven't I? Well, the blonde was drunk when she met me, and partially because of this and partially because she is a very excitable and possibly obssessive character, she proceeded to inform me, about three hundred times in a row, how fond of me she was. I nearly broke things off with her right there and then, convinced that she was insane. Let me explain, she would not stop saying that she liked me! She'd say, "I adore you, no I really, really adore you. No, wait, I've got to let you know of how fond of you I am. I really can't say enough how much I adore you. Really, really, really," and then start again, making minor modifications, but sticking to the same general theme. I couldn't get a word in, or get her to stop. It was pretty damn ridiculous. I'm telling you, I've not been so perplexed in a long fucking time. It would have been the strangest thing in the world to break up with a girl because she insisted that you know in no uncertain terms how much she liked you, but then spoiled it by repeating it so much that you thought perhaps she was a malfunctioning robot programmed to entice and then destroy you.

But eventually, I escaped this little bit of the twilight zone, calming her down and settling for my first drink of the night and her hundredth or so. At some point, Fauxy's party appeared and I realized that the party had not departed, but taken place on the other floor of the bar, one I'd not even noticed. Nice. I hung around for a while, making conversation while a female blogger I've never met tried to make out with the blonde. When the DJ cranked things up a bit and the blonde and I got to scandalous grinding, it occured to me that it was simply time to cash in my chips and head on out. I said my goodbyes, took my ribbing for such unabashed PDA and headed for her place, where she promptly passed out of course.

I spent all of today in Brooklyn. The day began with sex and pretty much revolved around sex. At some point when our blood sugar was sufficiently depleted, we headed out to brunch. We came back and attempted to watch the movie, Serenity. With frequent breaks for sex, it probably only took us six hours to complete it. The problem is this. Ordinary signs of affection between the blonde and I are dangerous, as they often lead a lot further a lot faster than I'm used to. If I hold her hand on the street, she catches my eye and a minute later I realize we're stopped in the sidewalk full on making out. If she leans over for a kiss at a restaurant, we're shortly making the most disgusting display possible. And when in the safety of her apartment, every kiss inevitably led to me taking off her dress, a wonderful Summer dress in the style of that famous Marilyn Monroe picture with her skirt flying. Actually, with her freshly bleached gold and white hair, hourglass figure and sunny disposition, she was channeling a whole lot of Marilyn today. It can be strange hanging out with the blonde. I've never been with anyone who draws so much attention. As if her naturally astonishing looks not enough, she pairs them with a penchant for extremely sexy dresses and pushes things over the top with a really bold, outgoing personality. Restaurant patrons turn and watch, drivers linger at the lights to stare, men, women and little kids all pause. It's not all friendly . Walking around Harlem with her drew the most evil of stares and at least one overly loud nasty comment. This is not stuff that makes me happy or suggests longetivity in this relationship.

Either way though, today was great and filled with the kind of ridiculous sex you only have at the totally unrestrained beginning of a relationship. Sex on the couch, sex in the shower, standing, with her head hanging off the edge of the futon and mine above the side arm of the futon. Okay now I'm just showing off. I had a great weekend. Tomorrow I've got to return to the real world and I ain't happy about it. Good night.